christmas took over december, and it was the same old thing that happens every year: everybody goes crazy with shopping, christmas music is played in every store you go in (and seemingly wafting from the air itself), holiday markets pop up everywhere (i spend way too much money), the city is flooded with lights, nobody cares about chanukah (again), and all the tv shows run christmas specials. it really is kinda magical. this year, i was lucky enough to sneak down to virginia for the holiday with my beau to spend some time with his family. it was tons of fun, especially because he has 2 hilarious kid nieces and a 2 year old nephew who referred to us all weekend as "hunkle mark and saywee." what was intended to be a 3-day visit turned into a 5 day vacation (thank you massive nyc blizzard) and we relished the extra time with plenty of visits to the mall, a matinee viewing of true grit, and late night xbox pictionary. then we came back to our lives and the worst thing ever happened to me. ok, not like disease or famine, but basically the worst. and its gross and humiliating but i have to write about if only to help slightly absolve the shame i feel towards those innocenct bystanders...i threw up on the train! i swear i wasn't hung over. that morning we got into town around 11am after a very early bus ride from dc. we rode on empty stomachs and went for breakfast at the diner across the street from our apartment. i had lox on a bagel, mark had the california omelette. i went to work at 4, already feeling queasy, and things went from bad to worse very quickly. i was sent home by 4:30 and opted to take the subway vs. a bumpy cab fighting to drive through half plowed streets. on the A train, i got a seat and things seemed stable. my transfer to the f train proved more precarious- packed car, no seats. i swayed back and forth with the motion of the wheels; a metal hydroplane below ground. two stops before my own i started to get concerned. one stop before, i opted not to get out and struggle home through the snow banks. just a few more minutes...and it was over. over everyone around me. i cried out "i'm so sorry" between heaves and gasps. people desperately attempted to dart my stream and struggled to find non-existant inches to seek refuge in. the doors opened and i escaped into the more forgiving concrete platform. i waited until everyone else had exited, my face tear-stained, my jacket, well just stained. above ground, a man saw me soaked and dazed. he asked if i was ok. i must have looked like i'd holed up in a bowl of egg nog during the storm or possibly a meth addict who'd just escaped the clinic, or like that girl who pukes on the train (you know, that girl). i couldn't believe this was me! he offered to buy me a soda and i mumbled something about living around the corner and ran off into the snowy night towards the memory erasing hot shower awaiting me inside my apt. but I am still so sorry, to all of you unlucky folks who got on my car on the downtown f train that evening. so to all my homies whose night i most unintentionally but certainly ruined, i wish you the happiest of new years. may your 2011 be vomit free, esp in small closed in areas with no escape.
as for you lox, we're not over yet. it takes more than a little 7 hour bout with food poisoning to make me quit you. i'll be seeing you soon again, but probably. definitely. not at that diner.
*picture from here
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